I had both the kids on my own Saturday while the Husband was out of town. I planned some activities, one of which included a trip to the neighborhood "Learning Shop" for a puzzle or a game that would keep us occupied during that dreary, rainy, cold afternoon.
Turns out the Learning Shop is code for run-of-the-mill toy store with beaucoup stickers to try and give it educational street cred. The big little man gravitated like a magnet to every motorized, giant vehicular bright colored box he saw. Again and again I said no. No No No No No No. This was not what I had in mind.
I did everything I was supposed to do to try and thwart a meltdown. I made eye contact as I explained that's not why we were there. How we had talked and AGREED before we arrived that we would be getting a puzzle or a game. I was calm. I was firm. I gave choices and outlined the consequences.
He, on the other hand, lost his freaking mind.
A major, mach-15 meltdown started out slowly and then took off like a motorized plastic rocket ship with blinking lights. BeforeI knew it he was screeching at me. He was red in the face and he was jumping up and down. He refused to try to calm down long enough to hear me out and began running through the store with some piece of crap plastic motorcycle in a big box.
There I was holding the baby in one arm, the diaper bag slung over the other, chasing my boy around this store while he screamed like a banshee. Literally, running. Thankfully it was a small store and it was not crowded. As I did laps trying to keep myself from losing my cool as well, I noticed there were a couple of bored clerks at the counter pretending not to witness what was happening and a handful of other mothers there, only one or two of them with their kids. (Ding ding- should have been my first clue this was not a good idea.)
I was mortified.
Not because my kid was causing a scene. No, I'm beyond that. I was stunned that not one of these other mothers or women tried to lend a hand or intervene in any way. They wouldn't even make eye contact with me. I was trying to wrestle a box away from a squirming four year old while trying not to drop the eleven month old and they went right on perusing the overpriced Thomas toys like we weren't even there.
The one or two moms who were busy herding kids? You are officially off the hook. I don't expect that they would have stepped in as they had their own meltdowns to prevent. I'm cool with that.
But those parents who were un-tethered? I would have hoped at the very least one of them would have casually blocked an isle, making it harder for my boy to get through and give me some advantage.The gold star would have gone to the lazy ass clerk who could have come over and pried the box from the wild man's hands while I tried to reason with him.
Don't we look out for eachother? There is no way you could have been in that store and not known exactly what was happening.
Here's what I would have done for any one of you:
If it were me watching this drama unfold I would have hovered. Not got in the moms face or tried to convince the boy that everything was okay, but I would have stood close enough to let the mom know I was on her side.
If given half the chance, between screams, I would have asked if she needed a hand. If the mom was flustered, looked irritated or said no, I would have walked away, no harm done. Maybe I would have grabbed a cart for her so she could set her bag down while she wrestled that god damned motorcycle out of his hot little hands.
If she said yes I would have offered to hold her bag or have tried to intervene. I know you don't grab someone else's child but I would have made sure that boy wouldn't have gotten past me.
At the very least I would have given her the all knowing, "It's OK, we all go through this" look.
I got nothing.
Neither, by the way, did he.
