The other morning as I was putting the baby's bottles away in the day care refrigerator, his teacher helped him steady himself standing at the activity table. He let go and stood up on his own, as he has been prone to doing. Mama look! she said, drawing my attention to that sweet child, standing there like a big boy.
I smiled at him and his face turned up into a gigantic grin. I held out my arms. Come here baby, walk to mama, I said. It was instinctive, encouraging him to take that next step, but I was never thinking he actually would. Then he did. He took two or three wobbly steps towards me and collapsed into my arms.
The teachers and me, we all broke out in spirited cheers and applause. He looked from one face to the other, absolutely beaming from ear to ear. He was so very proud.
I'm not sure what scares me more, that he's on his way to walking or that he was eating up the applause like chocolate on a mint brownie with sprinkles on top. A boy child that loves attention spells danger to me.
But I won't think about that now. It's bittersweet, yes, but I'm not sad watching his babyhood fade away. I'm enjoying more than I ever thought I could watching him scoot on the floor and squeal with delight if his brother chases him. I love to watch his face as he picks up a new object and studies it. It's beautiful to watch his personality unfold before me a little more each day and I welcome it.
I have baby gates and a whole lot of practice kissing bruised knee caps and bumps forthe many tumbles he is about to take. I am looking forward to chasing him in the yard or watching him push a toy lawn mower down the sidewalk. I'm quite sure by the time summer ends we will running full speed into toddler hood.
Go ahead baby, take those steps. I'm ready to catch you.
